It’s hard to imagine, but a year ago I barely knew my fiance. I had no idea at that time that I would be marrying him. Oh, it was a delightful fantasy, but it was just that. A fantasy. Now, it’s more than a possibility.
Having said that, I will say that not too long ago, I had resigned myself to being single. I didn’t want to be single, but I also didn’t want to make a mistake by being hasty. I had finally come to accept, and believe, that it was all right to be single. That it’s not a sin to be single. Nor is it a sin to be married.
The Bible said so. 1 Corinthians 7:25-40
Concerning the Unmarried
25 Now about virgins: I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. 26 Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for a man to remain as he is. 27 Are you pledged to a woman? Do not seek to be released. Are you free from such a commitment? Do not look for a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.
29 What I mean, brothers and sisters, is that the time is short. From now on those who have wives should live as if they do not; 30 those who mourn, as if they did not; those who are happy, as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep;31 those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this world in its present form is passing away.
32 I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. 33 But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— 34 and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. 35 I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.
36 If anyone is worried that he might not be acting honorably toward the virgin he is engaged to, and if his passions are too strong[b] and he feels he ought to marry, he should do as he wants. He is not sinning. They should get married. 37 But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion but has control over his own will, and who has made up his mind not to marry the virgin—this man also does the right thing.38 So then, he who marries the virgin does right, but he who does not marry her does better.[c]
39 A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord. 40 In my judgment, she is happier if she stays as she is—and I think that I too have the Spirit of God.
The Benefits of Being Single
There is one major benefit to being single. A single Christian can best focus his–or her–attention on serving God. You don’t have to split your attention between your spouse and God. Or anything else, for that matter.
How many ways is a Christian’s attention pulled? The world pulls at you. You pull on yourself. Other people pull on you. Family. Friends. God pulls at you. Satan pulls at you. Now, imagine adding a spouse and children to the list. Suddenly seems a lot more complicated, doesn’t it?
Keep in mind, Paul (the author of Corinthians) says that this is just his opinion. It’s not a commandment from God. Still, it’s good advice, and it is true. Married people do have their attention pulled in more directions than single ones do.
That’s why Christians are advised to marry other Christians. Marriage is hard enough without fighting about religion or where you’re going to go to church. That’s why I waited until I found the right man.
2 Corinthians 6:14-18
14 Do not be [j]bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? 15 Or what harmony has Christ with [k]Belial, or [l]what has a believer in common with an unbeliever? 16 Or what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said,
“I will dwell in them and walk among them;
And I will be their God, and they shall be My people.
17 “Therefore, come out from their midst and be separate,” says the Lord.
“And do not touch what is unclean;
And I will welcome you.
18 “And I will be a father to you,
And you shall be sons and daughters to Me,”
Says the Lord Almighty.